All right. I’ve had a little time to cool down (and sober up) since my last posting about the late-term pregnant bitch drinking in the bar. And yes, I call her a bitch intentionally, though I do not know her personally or her situation and don’t give a damn what her excuses may be. Anyway, I’ve discussed this matter with a few of my people as well as a few bar-pals. Come to find out, the barpals don’t take issue with this like I do. In fact, they seemed more disgruntled with me bringing it up than with her actions. No bar-pal (though all my other friends were pissed about this pregnant woman reportedly (i.e., taking my word for it) observed drinking AND smoking either cigarettes and/or herb on her night out) had shit to say against her decision to drink and smoke while pregnant but me. So, once again, I come across as the asshole. Must be simply picking on a poor pregnant woman for no reason whatsoever. Apparently. What a jerk I must be.
The bar-pal (and off-duty bartender) who was playing pool with the out-to-here(!) pregnant woman claims she was only drinking wine spritzers. But I could’ve sworn I saw her drinking a blue drink and we have nothing in that bar to turn a drink blue that doesn’t contain liquor. And that says nothing about her smoking weed and/or cigarettes as well. Either way, probably not a safe place to hang around in when you’re that pregnant. Too many fights break out in that bar. Kind of a rough joint. And no one is bound to look out for your interests there, not the bartenders or your fellow patrons. We all go in there with the understanding that we’re on our own. Won’t likely find any backup if problems arise. Just every human for him/herself in there. The type of place it is. Very different in that regard than other watering holes I typically frequent.
Anyway, I understand this isn’t just about one woman misbehaving. Goes deeper than that on a few levels for me. First off, I do tire of certain women being given a free pass from judgment and scrutiny and exempted from criticism. Look, I get criticized all the time, and quite publicly and loudly sometimes. People like to tell me they think I can handle it, that I can “take care of myself.” Well, so can other women. That’s how we learn to do so, by being exposed to getting our feelings hurt and being challenged. Lord knows I get challenged pretty regularly, particularly by men. And a part of me does wonder how come other women seem to be granted a pass in this department, especially when they’re fucking up in arguably worse (and more immediate) ways. But when I ask people about this I tend to receive a bunch of excuses in the other woman’s favor. She somehow can’t help it. Perhaps she’s hurting right now. Perhaps she’s looking for something she’s lacking. Perhaps she doesn’t know any better. Perhaps this outcome is somehow better than her choosing to abort instead. Perhaps, perhaps, perhaps. But I have to wonder where these white knights are when I need backing and help. AWOL. Why? Because I apparently am obviously capable of fighting my own battles and discerning right from wrong, they like to say. Okay. Interesting how that winds up being a double-standard. Especially when I have a proven track record of NOT screwing men over with unwanted pregnancies or using a baby to extract income from a man or the State. And I do aim to remain as reasonable as I can, however well I accomplish that.
But that aside, I’m mostly perturbed because I see the writing on the wall for us as a society, and I also comprehend that womenfolk are just as much responsible for where we’re (collectively) actively headed as the menfolk, if not a tad more so. Motherhood is a major responsibility not to be taken lightly and those who act selfishly and drop the ball in a major way leave lasting psychological scars on their offspring, as should be clearly evident by now. This is an important role, perhaps THE most important when it comes to a child’s well-being and proper development. And yet I look out and see so many skanks behaving poorly, treating their youngens like lottery tickets to cash in so as to make their own lives more comfortable. I see men abandoning responsibility too, so don’t get what I’m saying here twisted — just that a grave responsibility lies with mothers in particular since there is truth in us being the ultimate gatekeepers when it comes to sexual access and opting to bring pregnancies to full term. And we know this. Not a secret. We women are not simply victims of circumstance. We have options that we damn-well can pursue if we want to, that being the beauty of the technological age we live in. Yet we squander so much of the power we do possess and instead like to try playing the victim more often than not. It’s embarrassing to observe and reflects poorly on the Feminist movement as a whole, that much is for sure. Gives the distinct impression that plenty of women aren’t actually interested in achieving “equality” but instead would rather corner the market on power to benefit themselves, even at the expense of men, their children, and society as a whole. Winds up looking awfully selfish in the end. The entitlement complex is unbecoming no matter who is sporting it these days…
Then there’s the moral question pertaining to bringing life into being that we don’t actually want and/or respect and, conversely, are using to suit our own ends. Not about the child or the other parent. More about our own egos and feelings of righteous indignation that leads to subversive actions taken against respect for the importance of family. Suddenly it’s all about one parent doing whatever she wants, everyone else be damned. If you aren’t going to fully respect and appreciate the child, why bring them into being? And if you are only going to harm them and possibly dampen their IQ due to your own recklessness, then you are the true asshole. Your selfishness has gone too far, and I don’t care what your girlfriends might like to tell you inversely. They are trying to justify their own problematic behaviors and choices. Misery loves company — that never ceases to be true. Children require love and proper guidance — that too never ceases to be true.
Pay attention to how many children are coming up these days in inadequate conditions in single mother households. You might like to believe your household may prove to be an exception, but the odds are against you. And any thinking woman can see that in advance. Pregnancies and motherhood aren’t something to treat casually, and I say this as someone who’s reckoned with these concerns all my life thus far. It’s not always easy. I’ve had opportunities to fuck over men and play the State as well, yet I opted not to, not because I am a wonderful person but because I am cognizant of how bad and deficient as a parent (particularly as a single parent) I would likely prove to be. Got enough issues. Yet most women don’t take time apparently to consider this deeply. Won’t. Refuse to take a long, hard look at themselves in the mirror and change course. Will not do so. Why? Because of wishful thinking? Everything will somehow magically fall into place the way you’d like it to simply because? Because you deserve to have it all? Because you believe yourself to somehow be above fucking up a kid psychologically and emotionally just by virtue of you being you, with no deeper introspection given to the matter? Because you figure kids are all resilient and are capable of walking off any and all damage done to them in childhood? Really it’s because you’re not stopping to think deeply enough on these matters and would rather throw your hands in the air and let the pieces fall where they may as if you have no real say or control in the situation. And THAT’S a serious problem with the victim mentality permeating our society at present.
The last thing we need right about now are more thugs and broken people added to the mix. Have enough of them already. Enough people get hurt by them as is. Yet women are the predominant gatekeepers capable of reducing this problem, if we so choose. But few care to take the matter seriously, as is apparent. “Fuck it,” they like to say. “Not my problem,” they say. Well, whose problem is it then? Always pain paying forward. Current generation doesn’t want to take responsibility for shit, so just let the next sort out the matter on their own, like a bunch of baby-boomers. Don’t want a youngen coming between us and our good time, right? Don’t want to exercise self-control when it’s most needed since that is hard and less fun.
I know. Seen it all play out time and time and time again. We all have. And it’s sickening. Yet we’re not supposed to pipe up and say shit lest we be considered assholes for doing so. I do know. Been down this road many times now and nothing ever changes. The stupid keep procreating like mad and don’t give a damn about the consequences. The reasonably smart try to avoid such pitfalls and then get blamed by others for not procreating since some are concerned about the number of idiots who are (procreating must remain a competition, even in this day and age). Can’t win for losing anymore. But to hell with most folks and their ridiculous expectations. Not worth paying mind to half the time, particularly when they argue for such drivel. A child deserves to be brought into a situation where he or she is wanted by both parents, and hopefully extended family as well. Otherwise they wind up behind the 8 ball right out the gate, and how is that worthwhile?
All they need is to be used as pawns by adults with agendas who are more concerned with their own security and comforts than the healthy upbringing of their children.
And yet I am the asshole for pointing this out. Okay. Whatever.
To paraphrase a Chinese proverb, if we keep on this way we’ll indeed wind up where we’re headed. Just wait and find out. Go ahead and try to hide your head in the sand until your day of reckoning rolls around…