Perusing AVfM tonight for the first time in a while. Came across this post in their Introduction forum by a man sharing a whole lot of details about what he claims to have been put through as a child. (My spidey sense went off on it too, for the record.)
Not gonna make light of what that man Thomas wrote. If he was in foster care, he has my sympathies. And sexual abuse as a child can screw up a person’s mind in severe ways and perhaps permanently in some cases. Not all are constituted equally nor all capable of coping to the same degrees. That’s just life — not a judgment.
That aside, I’d just like to respond to the conclusion of that thread after “professional” guidance had been suggested. My thoughts on the matter here just as in any case I read about where someone seems traumatized by their pasts are that the mental health field is seriously fucked up and I so wish there was another way available. There’s something jacked-up with too many of the people involved in that field of employment, plus there’s a lot wrong with the theories they tend to operate with, PLUS there’s a lot wrong with how they’re driven to medicate people and how poorly those drugs actually appear to perform. Are the “side” effects even worth it?
It is not uncommon for suicidal ideations to be exacerbated by piling on psychotropic drugs.
The possible therapeutic benefit of psychiatric drugs remains highly debatable all across the board.
Beyond that, those entrusted with the title of “mental health professional” really do tend to too often be the last damn people worth talking to. My own direct experiences are limited, but I garner this from that, plus what I’ve heard from so many others as well as what I’ve read on the subject. The psychiatry profession as a whole is a serious concern all unto itself (for readings that go into it outside of the mainstream focus, there’s Dr. Peter Breggin, having personally so far read his book Toxic Psychiatry, and Dr. Thomas Szasz), and on various levels. To direct people toward it, while well-intentioned, can wind up doing more harm than good. Sadly enough.
But what can we do about this if the situation truly is already as is claimed? I don’t know. But this bugs me. I realize we have little choice but to direct people that way in hope of them finding a worthwhile therapist who can aid them, especially considering we laypeople often cannot. Where would we even start? And online? That’s not going to be what he likely needs.
This brings up two thoughts for me. While psychiatry (and much of the Psychology field too overall) deserves to be lavished with critical scrutiny, we lack any other real alternative for people at present (beyond already being bonded in and/or establishing supportive friendships and kin connections). Do we not really need public alternatives to Psychiatry? But what could that be? Secondly, though already mentioned, I’ve found that the people who help me cope the most have been my close friends and loved ones. Without a constructive bond existing or being established, it can often be a pipe dream to expect someone to really and truly receive help. We’re social beings who greatly value our connections, and it’s this lack of (or damage to) connections to begin with that tends to screw us up so bad.
Easier to provide quality care upfront than to try to repair the broken pieces later, or so it’s been said. But life is turbulent, especially in modern times despite all the material comforts now available. Cultures are in flux and being overran by brand-new ways of looking at life. Technologies have been rapidly ramping up over the last century in particular, and we’re all impacted by that whether we want to be, or are even fully cognizant of it, or not.
That’s what I’ve come to believe anyway.
Though, I also think that some of what winds up broken can’t always be fixed. No guarantees there. Hard to say when exactly that applies since it doesn’t seem to be simply a measure of violent exposure alone that determines this. This isn’t something Science alone can tell us a lot about. Personal will can and does factor in a lot as well, degrees varying, plus social influences and how they stack up over time. One’s own personality matters a great bit in terms of how one views the world and can cope. Not all can cope, and not in the same ways. And I don’t know what, if anything, can be done about that.
It’s just an observation. Not a criticism of anybody on that thread. Just thinking aloud.
Then I began watching an AVfM podcast and now at around the 26-minute mark they bring up a man’s semen being his own property. Well yes, BUT if one donates it, then there it goes. While I can understand that taking reasonable precautions can show intent for not wishing to share the actual seeds with another, there’s always the risk of the precautions failing. Same goes for birth control (and Plan B) pills for women. I don’t know what to tell people on that either. Been thinking on it for many months though (and believe I’ve blogged about it elsewhere on here). If I were a man I’d view the situation very differently, but as a woman who doesn’t want kids it’s another matter. I do have the power at present to choose to not undergo an unwanted pregnancy. Different tools in a woman’s toolbox there (speaking as an American).
Vasalgel can’t get released to the public soon enough. That would be wonderful. Wouldn’t fix everything entirely, but it could go a long way in giving men the ability to choose as well.
Update the next day: Spoke to someone about this post and am wanting to clarify that this isn’t so much about AVfM or the “manosphere” or anything like that — that thread just got me thinking about the field of psychiatry and the harm it can do. Plus, a lot of counselors out there turn out to not prove too useful. And this sort of issue can effect anyone and everyone, not just males in particular. My beef here is only with the field of Psychiatry specifically, though I understand members on that site aren’t in a position to recommend anything else to a person than to seek out local professional help. It’s really beyond the scope of what they’re equipped to handle on a site like that — I totally get it. But that doesn’t stop me from grumbling about the psychiatric field and wishing better alternatives existed and were as easily accessible to people who are struggling.
It boils down to another pipe dream on my part, that’s also understood. This goes back to our social setups and support networks and how those ties and ways of life are actively being eroded as we move into most-modern times. Not sure what, if anything, can be done about it though.