“Yes All Men”

Was invited by a buddy to check out a post on a blog I’ve never been to before where the male blogger was chastising men in general for not sticking up for women who feel threatened by men. He titled his post “Yes All Men,” and a relevant excerpt from him follows:

Yes, it’s all men who are responsible. Let’s face it: we live in a culture where we are the dominant group. If we got together, stood up, and said “We’re not going to tolerate this shit anymore” – if even a decent-sized minority of us were willing to stand up and say it – the hateful assholes would be driven underground. If we stood up and said “No”, and made sure that any shit-headed bigoted woman-hater actually paid some price in standing in our communities, the threats would end.

If we acknowledged that the violent hatred of women was not just a sickness; that a threat to women is a real threat to other human beings that was serious; that those threats are crimes. That the everyday threats against women are more serious that the threats of terrorism that we’ve used to justify war. If we did that, we’d have to admit that we need to do something about it.

But we don’t. We sit and watch, and downplay the threats. We say that they’re not really serious, that’s just how people act on the internet. We say that the threats don’t matter – those fragile women just need to “man up”, and grow thicker skins. And when women die – as they do every day – we just say it was a crazy person, there’s nothing we can do about it.

So I jumped into the comment section to share my views and was swiftly dismissed as a “sock puppet account.”  lol  Because, heaven forbid, one woman out here might not be dealing with constant threats of violence every time she logs online. Apparently impossible to comprehend that. So I’m posting this here, after already linking them to my youtube channel and still being referred to yet again as a sock puppet.

What is up with all the dismissiveness people show toward those who happen to disagree with them? Also accused me of being an MRA for not toeing their feminist line, and I find that quite laughable. Then told my buddy who for a long time has considered himself sympathetic to the feminist cause to “check his privilege” because he said something one of them didn’t completely agree with — how flippin’ typical. Geez…

So anyway, here I am and I am a real-life woman.  If this doesn’t satisfy, then I just don’t know what it will take.

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7 Responses to “Yes All Men”

  1. Wyrd Smythe says:

    You do have to appreciate the breath-taking hypocrisy of men who so ardently proclaim the importance of not distracting from women’s voices… being the very ones giving you so much static. It would be funny if it weren’t so tragic.

    • Byenia says:

      Sadly, it’s terribly common. And this is why I kept telling you that feminism turned me off. Many people operating under that label are just following an ideology and don’t really actually care about all women or how our experiences do differ across the board. They care about a narrow band of women, usually middle-to-upper class and college-educated who embrace leftist political positions. Anything else is viewed as a traitor to *their* cause. So it’s not for me. Doesn’t represent me, tends to ignore and blame people like me, and doesn’t give a damn about someone like me. ESPECIALLY the male feminists, IME. Those guys are pandering to a particular type of feminist woman and can act like bulldogs toward all others who disagree on any small point. It gets very frustrating to keep coming up against, and I’ve been witnessing this for at least a decade already, both online and offline.

      • Wyrd Smythe says:

        Agreed. It’s that spectrum from “sympathizers” to “supporters” to “believers” to “fanatics” that seems to confound things. When anything becomes a dogmatic “religion” then the blinders go on, and anyone not at the same level of fanaticism is the enemy. (I suppose, at least in part, because more moderate views expose the level of fanaticism involved.)

        John Oliver did a long story about futbal (soccer) on his new HBO show. Brazil forbids selling alcohol inside stadiums (drunken brawls were resulting in deaths), but FIFA (the world soccer organization) forced them to amend that law in order to hold the World Cup there this year. Why? Because Budweiser is a major sponsor. It’s 100% about money, and potential deaths be damned.

        Soccer, being the world religion it is, and people being soccer fanatics, Brazil put holding the World Cup in Brazil above public safety. There is also the fact that the World Cup and the Olympics are being more and more recognized for being financial disasters for the countries holding them. There is literally no upside for Brazil other than following the fanaticism.

        This is the world we live in. (I just wrote a rant for today’s post: Idiocracy… a riff on the state of today’s world and a favorite movie of mine.)

        WRT “Yes, All Men” (BTW: your link is messed up — it points to this blog), I kind of had Mark’s number from previous posts he’s written on sexism. He is, indeed, one of those hard-core feminist fanatics who actually end up giving feminism a bad odor. The caution I issued — and which raised such a firestorm of outrage — was squarely directed at him.

        But as I wrote elsewhere in that thread, Ignorance Shields were set to “Impenetrable” (more’s the pity).

        • Byenia says:

          Hey Wyrd,

          I intentionally directed those guys to this blog to see this post since the old blog’s gonna remain private. Just aiming to prove I’m a real-life woman, not some voice in your head. ha And this one is linked from my YT channel as well, which should serve as proof enough.

          “Idiocracy” is one of my favorite movies too. 😉

          Fanaticism is a helluva drug.

          • Wyrd Smythe says:

            The link on Good Math points here, but so does the link in your post above. It could be there was no “http” in front, and the blog software just assumes the link is to somewhere on this blog.

            Back on topic, I note Mark hasn’t acknowledged, let alone apologized for, calling you a liar. I really did think he had more character than that.

            • Byenia says:

              Ohh! Gonna fix that pronto. Thanks for letting me know! [Turned out to be missing the http portion, you were right.]

              I’m not impressed with that Mark guy. Pretty flippin’ rude, if you ask me. But people like him are a dime a dozen.

              • Wyrd Smythe says:

                I’ve noticed the rudeness before, even in his math posts. Not that it’s an excuse, but he does suffer from clinical depression and severe social anxiety according to one of his recent posts.

                Maybe it’s having worked in the artistic community so much, but I tend to cut people with notable talents and/or skills more slack than others. Two of my character traits (flaws?) are that I’m somewhat of an intellectual bigot, and I tend to believe in a meritocracy.

                So what I’m saying is I’ve overlooked that in the past, but this most recent round goes beyond the pale, even in my book.

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