Incompatible.

And then he decided to go away, once again. Just up and out of my life, this time for real, so he says. Why? I don’t know. Says it doesn’t work, partly because we do not communicate well. Always said we’d remain friends, but now that’s not looking like the case either. Why? Things seemed to be improving between us for a while and I was feeling better about us. But now…all over, once again. And I don’t completely understand what happened this time.

I am so tired of this yo-yo bullshit. Fucking depressing…

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And then he calls and tries to act normal all over again. We fight and we feud and we fuss, then we get along for a while, then something stupid arises and we’re right back to going ’round and ’round for a spell until we tire of that. I won’t pretend to fully understand anything other than that relationships are complicated. Just because we love each other doesn’t mean we get along terrifically, and such is life apparently.

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5 Responses to Incompatible.

  1. Wyrd Smythe says:

    My condolences. That sucks.

    • Byenia says:

      Yeah, it sucks. But, like usual, it’s a waffling back and forth after harsh words are spoken. One minute it’s basically go our separate ways, the next it’s we’ll still see each other occasionally, maybe once a week, finishing the call with “I love you.” I couldn’t be more confused. This shit just fucks with my head.

      • Wyrd Smythe says:

        I can kinda relate. My marriage had a definite up/down aspect that made things pretty awful — all that uncertainty… Relationships are really hard!!

        • Byenia says:

          We talked things out once more and appear to be in a better space now, though we remain separated and have agreed to free ourselves up to move on to dating other people if we so desire. Doubt either of us will be keen on doing so anytime soon though — still very wrapped up in one another, just couldn’t be more different as people. And that’s the way it can go, love being a strangely irrational beast.

          But so long as we’re able to maintain our bonds as friends (and cease bickering over so much dumb shit), I think things will ultimately turn out all right and maybe even for the best. Gonna give it more space and focus my energy toward other projects and then just see how things go on down the road.

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